Eros

I'll be honest, I've been very much undecided about publishing this post. As an individual who is very much individual, I’m not one to start talking about thoughts, feelings and romance. Catch me talking about how much I loved a particular coffee shop. Watch me chatter enthusiastically about something not actually interesting. But talking about relationships? An altogether more serious and unexplored area of my daily life. I don't feel qualified to talk about Eros.

Except relationships have flung their way into my existence because many of my friends who I’ve known as individuals are soon to be married. That means they’re united with someone else, by law. They become one. 

I guess it’s important at this stage to establish that unlike the perception of many Hollywood films, I’m incredibly happy being a single person in a seemingly relationship-crazy world. I’m genuinely loving the place I’m in right now and it just happens to be different to regular humans of my age. And even more unexpected from regular Christians of my age. 

Inevitably though, in the circles I’m part of, there’s a lot of engagement and marriage on the scene. I’m attending five weddings in 2014 so far and I’m incredibly excited. Although I hashtag things like #weddingseason, each is very individual. There are some incredibly special people who I’m supremely enthused to celebrate with. Of course I have to be there. I wouldn't miss it. 

I’ve learnt a little that there are some things about weddings and marriage that mean big compromises and I’m recognising the passion and love that must be evident before embarking on such an adventure. What happens when you disagree about the style of ceremony? How do you cope with the difficult family member? Choosing a place to live that suits you both? Getting used to each other’s daily habits? Knowing when to say sorry? 

These are just some of the questions that I’m just not ready to be compromising about; and consequently, some of the things that make me realise how stubborn and independent I am. But knowing some of my friends in the way that I do, I recognise that the reason they’re willing to change their minds is because of the people who have promised to unite with them forever. Not just that individual but the unique relationship they’ve crafted together. The support and love and confidence and reassurance. I’m amazed that such relationships can spark this desire of commitment. I’m confused and inspired and impressed all at once. 

I’m not ready for that yet. But I am incredibly happy to be that person who wants to continue to support and love friends who are on that journey. I don’t really understand how to be helpful, but I’d like to be. And sometimes, prayer is all that’s necessary. Other times, it could be listening. Sometimes it’s learning something exciting about gift lists. 

This bracket of my life is definitely a season of growth and feeling all of a sudden, incredibly grown up. 2014 brings some monumental days; some joy-filled and enthusiastic ceremonies and parties. But beyond that it’s the expansion of life; some special people gaining a partner, hopefully for life. And rather than denying the importance or significance, I’m beginning to understand a little of its joy. 

Eros - Romance. 

This post is part of a mini-series on The Four Loves. Read the others by clicking on the label below...